Unravelling Travelling

Winter. The season of unlimited cups of hot coffee, numerous layers of clothing, rooftop bonfire parties and reminiscing about the year gone by. I love winters,and for me they always mean ‘travel’. My family and I make it a point to take a short trip every December to escape the cold and foggy weather of Delhi, and to end the year on a good note.

Since I started blogging, I am always on the lookout for opportunities to get good content and let me tell you, airports are a goldmine for the same! I recently came back from a short vacation overseas and traveling abroad by air, is at the very least an 8 hour commitment, if you include the check-in, immigration and security check. In that time one comes across plenty of characters that can make for an interesting experience, kind of like a souvenir from the trip!

If you’ve read the article ‘Life in the Delhi Metro’, you must know that Manasvi (my co-blogger) and I absolutely love observing people. Through careful observation (aaaaand after passing a lot of judgment), I have come to realize that people at the airport can be broadly grouped into the following categories:

1.The Klutz- I don’t think that this person has ever heard of folders. Most likely to forget his passport, misplace the boarding pass and earn some of the choicest abuses from those being held back in the queue because of him.

2. The Frequent flier- Wearing a suit, holding a designer duffle-bag in one hand and a laptop in the other, this person goes waltzing by while the rest of us stand and wait in the economy line, slowly losing sensation in our legs.

3. Mr/Ms Never-on-time- Being fashionably late is not a thing when it comes to catching a flight! It is an unspoken rule that one needs to arrive at the airport at least 3 hours prior to the scheduled departure. But there is always that one person who is running from one end to another in a frenzy, elbowing others while jumping queues. Hey you, how about going back to primary school to learn how to tell time ?!?!

4. The Selfie obsessed- This person goes on taking selfies every 5 minutes like it is his/her last day on Earth; one outside the airport, another one once inside, then another while waiting in queues, then more with anything remotely artistic in the background- a modern but highly annoying version of ‘paint me like one of your French girls’ !

5. Oldies doing it right- One is likely to come across a silver-haired couple on their way to celebrate their anniversary or truly enjoy retirement by travelling to new places. They are sweet and wonderful to talk to. Basically they give you #couplegoals.

6. Satan’s children- As it is aeroplane seats are uncomfortable making it near impossible to get any rest, add to that a howling baby with a dirty diaper, throwing up everywhere- Voila, you’re in hell ! Enjoy your slow death.

7. Couples on their honeymoon- If I had to choose between a howling baby and a handsy couple, I think I would choose the baby, because he/she will stop crying eventually, but this couple (UGH) will continue their PDA(that is the most subtle and sophisticated way of putting it) making others uncomfortable. Nobody wants a live screening of them joining the mile high club!!

8. Desi travelers- You know how in many bollywood movies, they show the stereotypical Indian family travelling with a whole bag of khakra-fafda-maggi and the likes? Well that is a stereotype for a reason. Indians-redefining the concept of ‘meals on wheels’ since forever...

9. The Overloaded- Traveling light? What’s that!

10. The Gadget freak- You pray hard to not get stuck behind this type during security check because his/her bag is like a Pandora’s box of electronics; once asked to open, there is no end to it. The icing on the cake is that despite repeated announcements asking passengers to put all their gadgets inside their bags for security check, this person will forget at least 2-3 in his pockets and go through the screening process a million times.There goes one’s chance at browsing the duty free section leisurely!

11. First time traveler- Standing in the wrong lines, misunderstanding instructions, asking awkward questions, exuding enthusiasm at every tiny thing, this kind can provide a comical relief to the frequent fliers from the mundane routine at the airport.

12. Disgruntled staff member- How can I forget that one extremely rude member of the airport ground staff with a sour-puss face, who is just a few decibels short of yelling at the passengers. You’d rather stand in another queue, even if it is longer, just to avoid this person.

So the next time you’re at the airport, spot these types in the crowd to keep yourself occupied to pass those long-long hours there. Happy Holidays everyone!


P.S. A big shout-out to our wonderful readers for supporting us and making 2017 a lot better than what it was. As we step into 2018, Manasvi and I promise you more of such relatable content and a newer-improved version of the blog, so stay tuned for more of our Musings & Mutterings. Happy New Year folks! Let’s make it a good one.

Periods- The Supervillain

Hey there!

Aunt Flo, Shark Week, Crimson Tide/Wave, Chums, Time of the month, Lady Business and my personal favorite- The red wedding. All the words might confuse the guys but girls are way too familiar with these euphemisms.

In our country, Periods are only to be discussed behind closed doors and in hushed tones. Even then, no direct reference is to be made, only one of the 5000 code words may be used. This topic is such a big taboo that one of the top brands that sells sanitary napkins is known as ‘Whisper’. God forbid, somebody may hear you talking about a totally NATURAL biological process female human body goes through.

The Padman trailer was recently released (If you haven’t watched the trailer already, you must. Watch here) and it has garnered a lot of support and appreciation from all over the country. This makes me very happy, because menstruation is an issue that really needs to be talked about. The tagline goes like- “Superhero hai yeh pagla”. No doubt, he is a superhero, but to learn that only one in a million was concerned enough about his wife's and sister’s well-being to do something about it, is heartbreaking. It’s not that men don’t know anything about it, they just choose to ignore it. One can say that this is because they are conditioned to ignore it since childhood, but they are taught a lot of other things and I don’t see all men following those teachings religiously.

This is my story of initiation into this super secret women’s only society- When I was 9 years old, my cousin was on her period and acting very dodgy so I asked my mum what was up with her and my mother was caught unaware because she hadn’t prepared for this conversation yet. Nonetheless, she cryptically told me, “Your sister has a disease and you might have it someday.” I’m sure many girls were told the same thing. This needs to stop now. Periods are not a sickness, if anything they make you stronger, I mean which man can bleed for 5-7 days continuously and still go about his business without complaining? In some parts of the country (south and east) the first period is celebrated, when I read this I rejoiced! Alas, there are a few people who actually respect women for the goddesses that they are. But after a little more digging I found out that although there is a celebration, later the girls are subjected to third class fourth class treatment. 

While I was in college I attended a seminar featuring Goonj founder Anshu Gupta and that was the first time I learned that not all women have access to sanitary napkins or tampons. I was horrified to learn that an item that was a basic necessity for me, was a luxury for most (these women use rags, ash, sand and in a pinch- plastic. Don’t believe me? Read this article-Menstrual Health Landscape, India). Not only that, in many places women are forced to live frugally and in isolation during their periods. During a time when they deserve to be treated like queens, they are forced to live like they are untouchables. Everybody needs to realize that a woman menstruates because she has the capability of giving birth to another human, she creates another LIFE and you treat her like sh*t. If men could do that they would have us worship at their altar.

I am rooting for this movie to be a blockbuster. I hope it is everything it promises to be and is successful in sensitizing people about menstruation and teaching them that it is not a sickness and it certainly does not make a woman ‘impure’!

P.S.- Ab waqt hai sach mein badalne ka!

Best of- Ross, The Divorce Force (Friends)

Hii…



How you doin’?

Like any other normal FRIENDS fan I have seen the show a zillion times. In the beginning I did not have favorite character. They are all so damn good, how does one choose among them. However, after watching it countless times I have finally come to the decision that Ross- Brother, Friend, Boyfriend, Ex-Husband, Father, Paleontologist, co-founder of the 'I Hate Rachel Green Club’, member of the Divorced men club a.k.a Red Ross, is by far my most favorite character because the more I watch him, the funnier he gets. If your favorite character is Ross too and you want to unwind after a long day by watching the best Ross episodes then please keep reading! If you aren’t a Ross fan then too keep reading, I might change your mind! Here are some of my favorite Ross episodes (in no particular order):

1. The One With All The Jealousy- S03E12: To say that Ross is possessive would be the understatement of the year! Rachel is all praises for Mark and Ross can't handle it. He goes a little lot overboard trying to get Rachel's attention. Little tip- never send a barbershop quartet to your girlfriend's office!

2. The One With Ross's Tan- S10E03: Ross can't decide whether he should count mississippily or not and ends up getting the worst tan ever! Guess his Ph. D is of no use after all!



3. The One With Unagi- S06E17: Ross can't wait to show off that he 'studied' karate for a long time and that to be prepared for any danger that befalls us one need to possess Unagi (A state of total awareness). He ends up getting his 'unagi' kicked in the ass by Rachel and Phoebe!

4. The One With Ross's Sandwich- S05E09: We all know that Joey doesn't share food. But, eat Ross's special turkey sandwich with a 'moistmaker' and you will have to face the wrath of the paleontologist!



5. The One Where Ross Moves In- S05E07: Ross is a great friend and all, but he's not the best roommate. He comes with baggage (a lot of it) and his humidifier!



6.The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line- S04E07: This is the one where Ross re-discovers his ‘sound’ and digs out his old keyboard to play some music for the gang. It is the worst music ever. I know Phoebe thought it was great and that he was not ‘appreciated’ during his own time, but it’s been 20 years and I’m still not appreciating those wordless sound poems!

7. The One With Chandler's Work Laugh- S05E12: Ross just found out that Emily is getting married and he bumps into Janice at a bar. What happens next is OH.MY.GAWD. Finally (and thankfully), even she ends up breaking up with him for being too whiny!

8. The One With The Tiny T-shirt- S3E19: Ross portrays the role of the petty ex perfectly in this one. Even though it means wearing a tee that is 10 times too small for him!

9. The One Where Ross Is Fine- S10E02: This is my most favorite Ross episode ever! Ross is trying to deal with the fact that Rachel is dating Joey, needless to say, he is NOT fine. The double date that follows is just epic! "My FAJITAS!"


10. The One With Russ- S02E10: What's better than one Ross? 2 Ross! Rachel does not realize that the new guy she's dating is Ross's doppelganger. Put Ross and Russ in the same room and you'll be entertained for days!

11. The One With The Cop- S05E16: Where there's a will, there's a way. Well, that's not true all the time, because if the sofa doesn't fit your will can't make it PIVOOOOT!!



12. The One With Joey’s New Brain- S07E15: Ross has some ideas about his role in Monica and Chandler’s wedding and once again we have to witness Ross’s musical talent. His weapon of choice this time is the bagpipes.

P.S.- Pardon me if I went overboard-

Tryst with Sarojini

Love it, hate it, but you can’t ignore it! If you are a girl residing in Delhi NCR, chances are that you’ve been to Sarojini Nagar market at least once. This place is the Holy Grail for many college going girls, and is like a goldmine for anybody who likes to shop on a budget. And for good reason! There is nothing you can’t find here; jewelry, clothes, shoes, accessories, bags, home decor items and a lot more, you name it and it’s here, that too at jaw-droppingly low prices!

If Sarojini Nagar market had a tagline, I think it would go something like this: ‘सस्ता, सुन्दर और टिकाऊ !’. Personally speaking, I love this place. If you’re not a brand-conscious person and are mainly concerned with the overall look of products, then my friend, this is the place for you. I realize that going to a flea market, such as this one, may not be everyone’s cup of tea but I think that is mainly because of some misconceptions/expectations regarding the quality of the goods sold here. Firstly it’s a flea market, so if you expect to get excellent quality when you’re paying Rs250 for a sweater, then you’re being highly unrealistic .Secondly, shopping in such markets requires a lot of patience, for one needs to go through several stacks to find the good quality stuff. So please don't write-off such places unless you've spent at least two-three hours hunting.  Lastly, one also needs to be lucky enough to be in the market when it is flooded with the latest trends and not the old-rejected products, which is not different from shopping in a mall.

After innumerable trips to Sarojini, I’ve come to realize that a shopper needs to possess certain key skills to emerge triumphant (aka loaded with shopping bags) from such markets.

In this article I aim to share my limited wisdom on the art of successful shopping in flea markets. Okay so here goes:-

1. Eagle eye: You must possess the ability to spot the treasures in a trash pile otherwise you won’t be able to find anything nice. Sometimes the best items are at kept at the bottom, that’s when you must channel the inner archeologist in you and dig through the stacks!

2. Super Speed: Vendors usually have only one piece in each style so you have to be as quick as a cat and grab whatever catches your eye. Absence of this skill can lead to ugly brawls between shoppers and trust me, you don’t want to be a part of that.

3. Extra Energy: Don’t even think of coming to shop in such places on an empty stomach! Maneuvering through a sea of people and searching for items to buy, requires tremendous stamina. If you think you can snack and shop at the same time in a market where one barely has any breathing space, well then... enjoy your delusions!

4. Perseverance and patience: Impulse buys- the bane of gullible shoppers and the boon of all sellers. Don’t make the rookie mistake of buying the first thing you see. Always check out the neighbouring shops to compare the prices, variety and quality. Also, the saying ‘All that glitters is not gold’ holds a special significance in this context. If you don’t want to end up with a dress with bad stitching or a top with stains on it, make it a point to examine all the items you want to buy before making the payment.

5. Badass bargaining: I saved the best for the last. Bargaining is the essence of Sarojini Nagar, that rush of adrenaline when you successfully manage to get the price of the product reduced substantially, or when you pull off the ‘walking away from the shop’ acting bit, is truly unmatched! For those of you whose negotiation skills are not 'on point', here is a little tip: always quote 50% of the price stated by the vendor as an offer to him and then gradually keep on increasing it to meet him mid-way. But you should also know when to put your ego aside and pay as asked because it’ll be a steal no matter what!

Once you get the hang of it and have all the best shops mapped out clearly in your mind, it’ll be an experience second to none. Also, never underestimate the fashion related knowledge of the vendors. They are some of the first ones to know about the latest trends, thus not only are they selling you the good stuff but also telling you about the items that are popular -two for the price of one!

So ladies hone these skills and avoid going to Sarojini on weekends, but if you can’t do so, then ‘May the force be with you’ !

Fashion of Mass Distraction

Hello readers!

The last two articles published were ‘Life in the Delhi Metro’ and ‘The Good & Bad of Fashion 2017’. This got me thinking about the innumerable times I have noticed rather bizarre fashion choices of my fellow commuters. Before I continue, it’s important to get one thing straight: People should wear what they want to and how they want to. I’m not a ‘fashion nazi’ and I certainly mean no offense to anyone. Having said that, sometimes one can’t help but notice (and judge a little) those who truly stand out in a crowd by their choice of attire!

 

There are several ways to pass time in the metro; by reading a book, listening to music, watching a sitcom, chatting with friends etc, but the best/most-entertaining way has to be observing people and their odd choice of clothing & accessories. Here are some of the eye-catching observations that I’ve made :-

1.   The Disco ball: Admit it, we’ve all been partially blinded at least once by a person who went overboard with bling in broad daylight. A little bit of glitter and sequins is fine, but an outfit covered in it makes me want to run for cover from all that glare!

2.  Too cool for school: I’m talking about people who wear sunglasses while the train is underground. Keeping those with eye-infections aside, what could others possibly be  shielding their eyes from! Is there bright lighting? No. Is it dusty? No. Are you a celebrity facing crazy paparazzi? No. Someone please explain this to me because I, for the life of me, just can’t figure this one out!

3.   Sagging pants: This is by far the most irksome of all. No dude, I don’t want to see your underwear. Just pull up those pants! (My biggest fear is that they will drop: Too Much Information!) I live in Delhi, so please don’t add to the already-overflowing list of obscene things I come across everyday.

4.  Socks with sandals: If the colour of the socks worn with sandals was limited to beige/nude, I would have made my peace with it, but what I’ve seen is  wacky patterns in a diverse range of shapes and colours. Let’s just say that it’s not a sight for the sore eyes, it’s just a sore sight.

5.   Odd slogan Tee’s: I love quirky texts/graphics on T-shirts, but some are just baffling. Once I saw a college going girl wearing  a T-shirt with ‘papa ki pari’ written on it and this other time a guy wearing one which said ‘I am osum’. *cringe*

6.   The Superhuman: This person defies weather and the clothing patterns dictated by it. Allow me to paint a picture for you; It’s winter time and like others, I’m freezing and my teeth are chattering despite wearing layers of clothing, while in front of me standing is a person dressed comfortably in a single layer! What sorcery is this ?!?

7.     Makeup over-enthusiast: A little kajal and mascara never hurt anybody, but caking one’s face up and wearing super bright lipsticks when it just doesn’t go with the outfit reminds me of the clown from the movie IT.

8.    Weird footwear: Where do I even begin? Grass slippers, crocs, shoes with long pointy toes, shoes with tassels, loafers with long socks/without any socks, ugly bulky sneakers …… I could go on forever. Honestly, how did they even become trends!

9.    Colour-coordinated and Rainbow love: There are two extremes here; on the one hand we have someone who takes the concept of  ‘colour coordination' wayyy too seriously, while on the other hand we have someone who is just one colour short of looking like a rainbow! The first one needs to be introduced to the concept of colour-blocking and the second one to subtlety.

10.  Bappi Lehri style: One can’t underestimate the value simple pieces of jewelry can add to an ensemble; cool watches, pretty pendants, funky bracelets, quirky hair accessories, simple earrings etc. The idea is to pair one or a few of these with an outfit to increase its style quotient. Sadly, many ignore the saying ‘Less is more’ and follow ‘More is more, less is bore’.

 

So the next time you travel, keep your eyes open, for the metro is crowded and full of such errors!